This month, Patty Kikos interviews Margaret Skagias, a social worker who founded a charity called CaringKids, which offers practical support for young carers aged 18 years or less, who provide care for a family member living with a disability or chronic illness. CaringKids provides Toy Boxes (or Joy Boxes) to young carers Australia-wide, containing toys, books, puzzles, games, arts and craft materials, stationery, sports equipment and books. GUEST: Margaret Skagias - https://caringkids.org.au/ SOCIAL MEDIA: Follow Patty on Instagram Follow The Benevolent Society on Instagram Follow Carer Gateway on Facebook Follow The Benevolent Society on Facebook CREDITS: Host – Patty Kikos Producers – Patty Kikos and John Hresc Sound Engineer – John Hresc GET IN TOUCH: Carer Gateway is proud to offer emotional and practical services and support for carers with the aim of making your life easier. You can call us on 1800 422 737 to find out more about peer support groups, counselling, coaching, online skills courses, tailored support packages, emergency respite, other government supports, as well as tips and information, or visit our online home at www.carergateway.gov.au Got some questions or thoughts for Patty or the team? Email us at cgconnections@benevolent.org.au and put ‘Attention Patty’ in the subject line. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS: The Benevolent Society acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures.
This month, Patty Kikos interviews Margaret Skagias, a social worker who founded a charity called CaringKids, which offers practical support for young carers aged 18 years or less, who provide care for a family member living with a disability or chronic illness. CaringKids provides Toy Boxes (or Joy Boxes) to young carers Australia-wide, containing toys, books, puzzles, games, arts and craft materials, stationery, sports equipment and books.
GUEST:
Margaret Skagias - https://caringkids.org.au/
SOCIAL MEDIA:
Follow Patty on Instagram
Follow The Benevolent Society on Instagram
Follow Carer Gateway on Facebook
Follow The Benevolent Society on Facebook
CREDITS:
Host – Patty Kikos
Producers – Patty Kikos and John Hresc
Sound Engineer – John Hresc
GET IN TOUCH:
Carer Gateway is proud to offer emotional and practical services and support for carers with the aim of making your life easier.
You can call us on 1800 422 737 to find out more about peer support groups, counselling, coaching, online skills courses, tailored support packages, emergency respite, other government supports, as well as tips and information, or visit our online home at www.carergateway.gov.au
Got some questions or thoughts for Patty or the team? Email us at cgconnections@benevolent.org.au and put ‘Attention Patty’ in the subject line.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS:
The Benevolent Society acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures.
Margaret:
However for the young carers eg4–8-year-olds who also deserve and need recognition and support, we try to break down that age barrier - in an age-appropriate way - to show them that we see them, and that we notice them.
For every young carer who has said to me, “I feel like no one cares, no one notices what I am doing or even thinks of me”, we are attempting another way to demonstrate that we see them, we recognise and value them, and the care and love they provide - and we also want to share that sense of pride in their compassion, resilience and maturity that they demonstrate each and every day. We know young carers put caring ahead of school friends and play, we want to keep that as our focus and our mission to at CaringKids reconnecting young carers to their childhood.
Billy:
From the Carer Gateway at the Benevolent Society, we welcome you to, Carer Conversations with your host Patty Kikos.
The Care Gateway is the Australian Government national care hub and provides reliable services, support and advice especially for carers.
This podcast is where we share interviews with guests that have specialized knowledge to help support carers to look after their emotional, mental and physical well-being.
We are recording on Aboriginal country, on lands which were never ceded. We acknowledge the traditional custodians and cultural knowledge holders of these lands and waters. We pay our respects to Aboriginal elders, past and present.
Always was, always will be.
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Patty:
My lovely carers, how are you? Have you ever wondered how you could possibly support young carers or their parents?
Given that every caring role is so unique, and young carers' ages, and personal interests vary so much, it can be hard to know what type of support is needed, aligned or even sustainable for each person.
This is something today’s guest Margaret Skagias had to consider when she was inspired to start a charity and founded CaringKids in 2014 to address the practical support needs of young carers.
With over 20 years’ experience working across government and non-government sectors within Australia and overseas, Margaret has delivered and coordinated individual, group and community-based programs for children, youth and adults, most recently coordinating community support programs for a leading cancer charity.
Her determination to deliver practical support for young carers began after a four-year period delivering emotional support and respite camps for young carers aged between 8-26 years.
She influenced the inclusion of young carers in national government policy and advocated for services to assist them to complete their education. However, it was the first-hand account of young carers’ experiences, and the challenge they faced finding practical support, that were the inspiration for CaringKids.
Margaret has a Social Work Degree from Sydney University and also has a Master of Public Health from the University of New South Wales.
The charity she founded is dedicated to providing practical support for young carers aged 18 years or less ,who provide care for a family member living with a disability or chronic illness. CaringKids provides Toy Boxes to young carers Australia-wide, containing toys, books, puzzles, games, arts and craft materials, stationery, sports equipment and books. Margaret, what kind of people inspired you in your community when you were growing up?
Margaret:
I was surrounded by family members who were very active in our local community. They would coordinate regular fundraisers and social events, with a focus on bringing people together. They would also host specific fundraisers if there was a family who had a particular need such as a health issue to be able to step in and help the family. There were strong networks amongst people, and being part of the community brought people friendship and reduced social isolation. I think I was surrounded by this in my younger years and I still enjoy being part of my local community because of this today.
Patty:
And is this where you got your fundraising skills from as?
Margaret:
Well, I was involved in assisting with the fundraisers in different ways from a young age whether I was helping out in the kitchen preparing food for events or participating in the fundraisers as a guest. I hosted quite a few fundraising events when I was at school and have been fortunate to work at other charities where I supported fundraising events.
I think that fundraising can be challenging and there is still so much I have to learn about how to match the desire people have to help other people with our mission and vision at CaringKids
Patty:
It's hard to fundraise or promote yourself when you're self employed or for an organisation that you founded versus for a company that has many other employees supporting you isn't.
Margaret:
It absolutely is.
Patty:
And was it your family that would host these fundraisers or these community gatherings? I mean, was it that that inspired you to study Social Work?
Margaret:
There were many different factors that contributed to me making this choice, but one specific example that contributed to me going down this path was as a teenager, I chose to be part of the student representative council at school. I always had a fire inside me when it came to stepping up and speaking out to make change.
A few students were invited to attend a regional Leadership and Social Awareness Camp as delegates from our school. The program which was also peer led by previous student attendees focused on many leadership skills, life skills and personal development. The world of self- development opened up to me, and I enjoyed learning and growing within the group work experience. We returned to school and opted to host a day sharing our learnings by writing our own program and leading it with the rest of the SRC.
What I took away from this whole experience was the knowledge that you can develop skills and strategies to manage challenging situations and extend your personal growth and development. This led me to want to be able to work with other people to support them to achieve similar goals. I was totally inspired.
I began searching for a degree and I felt Social Work would open the door to me being able to work in a variety of settings, individual, community, or policy and advocacy, government or non government organisations with so many options to find the right kind of place to be of service to others across so many different areas.
Patty:
That's amazing. That's really incredible.
Margaret:
I think this was one of one of the the the things that led me towards choosing social work.
I I began searching for a degree actually when I was in high school and I felt that social work would open the door to me being able to work in a variety of settings, whether it was with individuals, community.
Possibly policy or advocacy, whether it was government or non government, I I felt there would be so many options where I could find the right place to be of service to others in many different ways.
Patty:
You chose well, what were some of your social work roles?
Margaret:
So I I started off when I when I finished Uni taking a role in a community health centre where I had completed my student placement the year before.
Patty:
Ohh, lucky. So, you were already familiar with everyone and they also knew you.
Margaret:
Absolutely, and I think some incredible people where I where I began my first sort of you know paid social work experience.
And prior to that, I'd also done a student placement in a youth health centre. So I I could tell from that time that I had a real passion for supporting people and I'm working within the health setting as well.
And once I sort of found my feet there, I also realised there was so much to learn in the area of health promotion.
I was able to support individuals, facilitate group programs and these were in areas including grief and loss, trauma, separation and divorce, and I also supported clients facing drug addiction.
Soon after that, I moved to the UK and I worked for social services in Child Protection and then a role in a public health unit in the local health authority.
This again, was a community health development role similar to what we would consider a health promotion role here and I was also able to do a bit of volunteer work while I was there back in, I guess an area that then I was going to step further into which was sibling respite camps for children who had a sibling and they described this as a sibling living with a serious illness or disability and.
And I really, really enjoyed again that camp experience, that group experience and also working with young people and young carers.
I moved back to Australia, and I decided to further my studies in Public Health and soon after I found myself working with young carers, coordinating respite camps and providing emotional support and referral.
This was followed by close to 9 years after this working for a leading cancer charity coordinating and delivering Cancer Support programs and cancer prevention programs and it was 8 years ago, now that I founded CaringKids and here we are today.
Patty:
What was it like coordinating camps for Young Carers?
Because I can't help but notice that the age ranges were between 8 to 26 years old and that's probably 3 different generations that you had to cater for. Not to mention the various cognitive abilities.
Did you love that role? Cause your face lit up when you when you talked about it.
Margaret:
Yeah, and I absolutely did. And I think you've you've hit it there, there are different ages and stages. So the children were grouped into 8 to 12 and then 13 to 18 and then 18 to 26, so that they were able to have age appropriate activities and support.
Patty:
That makes sense.
Margaret:
And you know, there were so many fun things that that that were on offer for Young Carers during the camps, things like archery and abseiling campfires, talent shows.
There was also a peer education component where previous participants, that is young carers who had been to a camp would return and lead groups for other young.
Patty:
This is a bit like deja vu. Back in your SRC days at high school.
Margaret:
Exactly. Yeah. So there it was all sort of coming full circle. And I was back in a situation where I was able to see these young people who were able to hear other people's story, and not feel so alone with their experiences.
And you know, young people leading young people. And this was taking me right back to those initial camp experiences and what inspired me to pursue a career in social work in the first place.
Patty:
Yeah, I can understand that. What was the most significant moment for you in your social work career?
Cause you've had quite a lot of vast experiences.
Margaret:
Working in carer support, this was something that really moved me to want to raise awareness of young carers and start CaringKids. I heard the story of so many young carers, parents and parents of young carers all of whom give their compassion, care, time and commitment to caring for their loved one. I was also influenced and mentored by the team of people I worked with who were equally passionate about finding new and dynamic ways to support carers.
There were many carers and young carers who bravely shared their stories including publicly in the media to help to raise awareness of carers .it’s really the culmination of the personal experiences of so many individuals that inspires me to do what I do now.
Patty:
You've worked with carers and young carers for so many years. What significant changes have you noticed over the years that you might like to speak about?
Margaret:
Just touching back on the point I mentioned before about people sharing their story and one thing, I've noticed personally over the last two years is how carers have been willing to share their story and also their health professionals who have dedicated their time and their expertise to speaking out about care.
The progress that I have seen personally over the last 20 or so years in Australia for carer recognition and support has been achieved by carers willing to share their story and many health professionals who have given their time and expertise to speaking out and creating change There are so many people I have good fortune to know and work with and behind it all is that desire to create more support and recognition for carers.
Perhaps the biggest change that has happened over the last few years has been the introduction of the NDIS. I am still grappling to understand the changes and implications for carers who are navigating advocating for services and the impact on them as a carer and also the care recipient.
Patty:
Yes, definitely. For sure.
Margaret:
I think there has been some great strides ahead in recent years with new support services becoming available and awareness of young carers in particular, such as the national young carer bursary or support available via Little Dreamers.
When it comes to young carers – the reason why I am so passionate about raising awareness is that young people don’t have the same options or capacity to share their voice as adults, it’s their hidden nature sometimes by design, young carers not wanting to be seen as different to their peers keeping their story hidden at school or high school.
Patty:
And there are so many more avenues that are available for adult carers to know about how their experience and their woes and their grapples with their caring role are also shared with other people, right?
Margaret:
So many more avenues are available for adult carers to know their experience is shared by others, and that includes online support, podcasts,, web based support that is flexible and carers can access from home - however for the young carers eg 4-8 year olds who also deserve and need recognition and support, we try to break down that age barrier - in an age appropriate way - to show them that we see them, and that we notice them.
For every young carer who has said to me, “I feel like no one cares, no one notices what I am doing or even thinks of me”, we are attempting another way to demonstrate that we see them, we recognise and value them, and the care and love they provide - and we also want to share that sense of pride in their compassion, resilience and maturity that they demonstrate each and every day. We know young carers put caring ahead of school friends and play, we want to keep that as our focus and our mission to at CaringKids reconnecting young carers to their childhood.
A person can be born a carer or become a carer at any time, there have always been people caring for their loved ones and there will be many carers in the future. Matching carers to the support they need is not a simple one size fits all set and forget strategy, we need to listen, we need to share stories, provide ways for cares to educate and inform service providers about their experiences.
Patty:
What advice would you give young carers and carers? Might be 2 questions I don't know.
Margaret:
Once thing I have observed is that every caring situation is unique, and so is every carer experience. Where one blanket suggestion or advice might seem helpful, it rarely fits everyone. Sometimes we just want to have the right answer or suggestion and hope that it can provide carers with a solution or comfort. It lies within each carer themselves to find what works for them, if it’s about self care, it’s about how to go about finding this within all the time constraints and competing priorities of being a carer.
Patty:
And ensuring you schedule it. Otherwise it will never get done.
Margaret:
That's right. I say do what’s right for you, if you wish to share your story and be heard there are so many avenues to explore, sharing your story is powerful as helps you to understand your own experience and it impacts the people around you, whether its on social media, online support, face to face counselling, or 1:1 like coffee with a friend.
There may be others thinking that this is the last thing they want or need, you might prefer a distraction or to zone in on something you really like to do that brings feelings of relaxation, comfort or joy, it could be a hobby, a good book, favourite tv show, talking to a friend on the phone.
Carers can spend a lot of time feeling exhausted,an endless list of things to do to achieve self care like eat well, sleep so many hours and exercise, it can be out of reach for some, I say sneak a bit of whatever you can when you can but if you can’t, be kind to yourself, you are doing so much.
Patty:
Yeah, that's right. And it's also important to teach our family that there is going to be some non-negotiable time where we need time to ourselves. It could be the 10 minutes every morning and where we drink our coffee or tea.
It could be a regular show that we wish to watch that's uninterrupted. It could be scheduled time to have a conversation with a loved one, or read a book. It's important to teach people how we want to be treated, isn't it?
Margaret:
I agree and you know small steps. Sometimes things might not go to plan, but it's the intention. It's just setting that time aside, and if it doesn't turn out that day, giving it a go again the next day.
Patty:
100%.
Margaret:
And if it’s all getting too much, and you feel yourself becoming anxious, withdrawing from friend or family or taking no pleasure in things that you usually do, see a GP and let them know how you are feeling, if you can’t leave your home find a telehealth GP or if you feel like you need more carer support contact Carer Gateway, as this was not something that was available when I worked in the sector.
If you are a young carer listening to this podcast or the parent of a young carer, and are wanting to connect with other young carers or find tools and strategies that may provide you with support I would encourage you to reach out to young carer support services to find out what may be available in your area, or online. You spend a lot of time putting caring first, it really is ok to think about your needs and what you need for you.
Patty:
Margaret, you founded a registered charity. First of all, why a charity and not a business.
Margaret:
A registered charity is a public benevolent institution where all profits help others, the structure is one that allows you to receive tax deductible donations from the public who wish to support your philanthropic work. I wanted to deliver a charitable service for young carers. We did operate a hybrid social enterprise model selling items to raise funds for the charity however this was not our primary focus. I also believe that a charity belongs to the people, it is governed by a Board of Directors and adheres to a constitution, it is not owned by a particular person like a business.
Patty:
So, you are for the people!
Margaret:
Absolutely.
Tell us about CaringKids and why it’s important for our carers to know that something like this exists, or how they can even create something similar.
CaringKids is a small grassroots charity that distributes toy boxes we like to all Joy Boxes filled with toys, games, school stationery, sports equipment and books to eligible young carers. Many times, young carers would tell me they felt that they weren’t noticed, and we hope each and every time a Joy Box lands on their doorstep young carers know that this is not the case. We know young carers put caring ahead of school study and play so we like to be able to share the items inside with them.
I also think the Joy Boxes help to raise awareness and inspires others to get involved whether it be individuals, families or corporate businesses. Anyone can get involved in helping young carers by making a donation to fund the creation of a Joy Box, buying a toy online via our website or if they live locally in other ways such as volunteering.Joy Boxes are available to eligible young carers who are registered with young carer charity Little Dreamers.
We operate a toy workshop where volunteers prepare boxes for young carers. Young carers are the sole focus and inspiration for everything we do.
Patty:
Not just the sibling or parent that needs that special extra attention, right?
Margaret:
That's right.
And I I think parents have commented to us that when a joybox arrives, it's also sometimes an opportunity to have a conversation with their child who is who is a young carer and it opens up a dialogue about how they've been feeling and just provides a lift in the home, in that moment where they can also, be seen. It's not a reward.
Patty:
But it's an acknowledgement, isn't it?
Margaret:
It's an acknowledgement, and many times there are a lot of services and support that are always available to their sibling and they are always amazed and they say “Ohh is is this for me? Yeah, it is just for you.”
Patty:
How can people help support CaringKids?
Margaret:
CaringKids is registered charity and public benevolent institution with tax deductible status. We receive no government funding. We rely on the generosity of our supporters and donors. If you would like to help us to bring joy to young carers
please visit our website www.caringkids.org.au you can choose to donate a Joy Box to a young carer and reconnect them to joy and wonder of childhood or make a tax-deductible donation of funds to help us further our carer support work
We are always open to corporate partnerships to help further our reach and impact,
Patty:
Yeah, I'll make sure that that website's on our show notes. My last question to you is what do you do to avoid burnout? As you run a charity, but you're also a mum of 2.
Margaret:
I am a mum of two, my children are 8 and 12. The best way for me to avoid burnout is to spend time with my friends and my family. There is really nothing that I enjoy more, could be just a coffee, or a walk together, I appreciate the moments I have with the people who are most special to me.
I can’t believe I made it this far without mentioning COVID but it did highlight for me how important our connection to others is for our wellbeing, and one of the reasons I really enjoy CaringKids also is the community we have amongst the volunteer and supporters.
Patty:
And you have built a beautiful community.
I think it might be time for your reward, which is a rapid fire wrap up question series.
Margaret:
Oh good!!
Patty:
OK, hard question. First, did you ever believe in Santa Claus? Be truthful.
Margaret:
The short answer no.
Patty:
Alright, give me a longer one.
Margaret:
I don’t remember a time where I believed Santa was real. I do recall someone saying to me when I was about four “you do know he’s not real don’t you??” and I was like of course! I always saw Santa as a mythical figure, a bit like Superman. If any kids are listening to this, he is real because if you don’t believe, he may forget to leave a gift under your tree…
Patty:
What about the tooth fairy? Actually, I'm not even gonna go there with you. OK.What’s the fastest speed you’ve ever driven in a car?
Margaret:
120kms – I like to stick to the road rules…
Patty:
I kind of don't believe it, but OK. I'll move on. What’s your favourite carb: pasta, bread, rice or potatoes?
Margaret:
Oh that’s too hard a question, how about all of the above?
Patty:
Excellent answer. Can you touch your toes without bending your knees?
Margaret:
Yes! I can but it’s not as easy as it used to be!
Patty:
When people stand up for a standing ovation, are you one of the earlier people to stand up, or one that stands up later?
Margaret:
Earlier, I am usually busting to stand up and just waiting for one other person before I get out of my seat. I like people to see the impact they have made on me, and clapping doesn’t always cut it.
Patty:
Yeah, I can see that. Margaret, you've been amazing. Thank you for joining us today on Carer conversations.
Margaret:
Well, thank you for having me.
Patty:
My lovely carers. I hope you found this episode inspiring as many of you know, my intention is to make the traditionally invisible nature of this role more visible.
And like Margaret said earlier, it's through sharing our stories and pooling our resources together that we can help others feel more supported within the different realms of our caring role.
I know I say this every time, but subscribing and giving us a 5 star rating really helps these episodes get into the right listening ears for people that need to hear them the most.
I'll be sure to leave Margie's website in the show notes for you, and I wanted to say thank you for being part of our show over the last few years. This is the last episode for 2023 so I’m wishing you happy holidays and a happy new year until we meet again in 2024.
Our first episode next year will be very exciting for those of you that are considering new years resolutions such as decluttering and getting organised for next year.
Til then, take extra good care of yourself and don't forget to schedule the things that help you recalibrate yourself. From all of us at Carer Gateway at The Benevolent Society, we send you our love and best wishes for the holidays. Take good care of yourself.